last night was a r0ugh one for me… as some of you know, or have read on facebook/twitter, i had a little “bullying incident” via the cyber world.
now, this wasn’t anything new for me. growing up, i was always the victim of cyber bullying. it was something that happened so often that i had grown comfortable in this position. comfortably numb.
during those dark times (middle school) i would comfort myself with food. which is ultimately how my weight problems started in the first place.
deep down inside of me, i thought those days were over. yes, they haunted me all the way through middle school, high school, and even college. but i truly thought that no one could make me feel that horrible ever again. i thought i was healed. confident. strong.
but the incident last night tested me. and i failed that test.
let me start from the beginning so you know exactly what i’m talking about — i’m not sure how many of you are familiar with twitter, but on the side of the page, there is something called “trending topics” — it’s a place where they show the most talked about topics.
well my friends, one of the trending topics last night was “#onlyfatpeople” – this means that SO many people started their tweets with “only fat people…” you can fill in the blank here with whatever you’re thinking.
the tweets were disgusting. they were horrible. mean. UNKIND. insulting.
being the girl that i am, i had to tweet SOMETHING in response to these awful tweets. so, i wrote:
#OnlyFatPeople is a trending topic? NEVER been so offended. I’ve had to deal with this rudeness my entire life & I’ve had ENOUGH.” and “This is NOT okay. Bullying GOT me to this dark place and it ISN’T fair. This world needs to change. KINDNESS needs to TAKE OVER.”
i should have known that i would get some kind of rude remark sent back to me. but i guess i’m sort of naive in that sense. i wasn’t prepared for the comments to follow.
someone actually wrote to me (among others) — “i can tell you’re fat, bitch. look at your profile picture… blerghh” and “how can you even let yourself get that fat?”
honestly, i couldn’t believe what i was reading. how could ANYONE say something like that to a complete stranger? this person has NO idea who i am. they have no idea what my life is like. they don’t know my struggles. my past. ANYTHING.
it shouldn’t have affected me at all! but it did. it REALLY did.
i was hurt. beyond hurt… why would someone say that to me?
the part that hurts more than those personal remarks towards me is the fact that people make fun of others in the first place. why do people bully others?! it’s something i’ll never understand. what do they get out of it? do they enjoy making others hurt? how can those bullies feel good about themselves?
yeah, it’s true. i AM overweight. but that does NOT need to be my label. people aren’t just overweight for no reason. i never wanted to be this way. does anyone?!
if there’s one thing i’ve learned throughout my life, it’s that EVERYONE has a story. and if you take the time to get to know other people, you’ll see them in a different way.
i don’t want to be known as “the fat girl, amanda” or “the over weight one” – why do we focus so much on outward apperance anyway? why can’t someone look at me and think “oh yeah, there is that KIND girl, amanda”
why label someone at all? what will it take to get rid of this in our world?
while we’re at it: if you don’t have anything nice to say about someone, then just DON’T say ANYTHING at all. you NEVER know how your thoughtless words could affect someone.
we need to spread KINDNESS all over the world. and you know what? kindness starts with YOU. yes, with you. one small act of kindness always has the potential to turn into something big. kindness can spread like wildfire. i’ve witnessed it. and it’s an amazing thing.
so while we could focus on the bad, lets focus on the good. there is so much HOPE for the future. i just know there is. so start with yourself and try to improve someones day.
give a compliment to a stranger. help someone who is struggling.
and one last thing — if you’re fed up with the bullying problem, then i strongly urge you to purchase one of my “BE KIND” wristbands. www.amandaleigh.bigcartel.com all of the profits go to the kind campaign: the kind campaign isn’t just about anti-bullying, their mainfocus is on the importance of KINDness.
one kind word goes a long way.
“be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”
“kindness is always fashionable.”
“be kind whenever possible. it is always possible.”